Back To The Stockyards With You!

My Future Kids are going to be employed starting at age 14 and remaining so ever after. It will be good experience or something. Teach the little ingrates the value of the dollar. Besides, I bet the service industry would be an excellent motivator to get a college ejikashin'. Maybe it would also be a good way to realize that there are more options after high school than college. Would it be a good idea to hand them the entirety  of their college fund the day they graduate high school, say "Good luck, Kid," and then kick them out of my house? It's really not my problem if My Future Kids decide to blow it all on crack whores, as long as they don't come back. I would be willing to accept them back into my home but only as renters until they actually have a place to stay of their own. At that point I will gladly accept them as family rather than outsiders who managed to cheat me out of quite a bit of money back in the day. No, they get to be accepted as family when they return on my investment and pay me back. I do not plan on needing or even missing the money, no, I plan to be ludicrously wealthy, but it's the principle of the thing.
I would say that they only need to pay me back for college or whatever because just as I once changed their diapers, one day they will change mine, but I do not plan to live long enough to require my diapers to be changed. Just in case, I suppose. Maybe one day I will blow all my money on crack and whores and when My Future Kids do not want to take me in, I will go on about the pain of childbirth and the struggles involved with raising such a rambunctious and miscreant of a child. Hopefully, that will distract  the most successful of My Future Kids while I push my past the door and into the master bedroom. I will not do this for the comfort of my aging bones as I will claim, but to assert my dominance. I suppose I could just urinate at key points around the house, but I do not think that it would be as effective.